My Roommate

My Roommate

Have you ever had a roommate who has unusual behaviors? Have you ever had a roommate who does not know the meaning of ‘personal space’? Have you ever had a roommate who irritates you and makes you laugh? Well, let me tell you about my roommate; he is a special kind of dude.

When he hears me wake up in the morning he walks to the doorway leading into my room, waiting for me to acknowledge his presence. While I get ready for work he walks into each room I am in, and just hangs out. As I get ready to leave the house he begins to mope and sulk, turning away from me if I try to engage him.

When he hears me get home from work he gets extremely excited. How excited you ask? His body wiggles, shakes, and twitches as he walks back and forth in the hallway. He even runs around the house, until he finds one of his toys to parade around. Every once in a while his excitement is so intense he cannot help himself, and a little bit of urine trickles down his leg.

When he hears my friends knock on the front door he runs to the door and yells at me to open it, never doing so himself. He will snap his jaw closed and gnash his teeth at them- an extremely unusual way to let them know he wants to play. If they are not in the mood to play he moans and groans from his disappointment.

When he hears me grab my keys he always wants to go on a car ride with me. He never sits in the front seat. Instead, he jumps in the back, sitting in the middle. Slowly but surely he will set one appendage, than the next, onto the center console, until his head and body are jammed between me and the passenger; too often he leans into my shoulder while I drive.

Our walks together are always an adventure, because I never know what he will do! Sprinklers are his worst enemy, so he must chomp on the sprinkler heads to try to stop the flow of their evil waters. Afterward he tears up the grass to prove his mightiness. And when he needs to poop he never waits to get home; he sticks his butt into some bushes and pushes it out!

In case you have not guessed who my roommate is yet, it is my DOG! (:

Dedicated to my best friend, roommate, and the most regal King ever,

King Ferdinand.

All my love,

Laron

Thoughts on an American Circus

You know what is funny to me? That people actually think Hilary and Donald are from different camps, and that they have different views. To me, both people are from the same demographic- predominantly white, wealthy Americans. Neither have the interest of anyone beside their donors, investors, and other professional relationships in mind.

If you do not belong to any of those groups your interests will not be served.

Donald is a representation of the misogynistic, narcissistic, megalomaniac that the century of self, consumerism, and capitalism that the American Ideology, and American Free Market Economy created. He is NOT a representation of every single male in this country, and is one of the most deplorable people I have ever heard of in the history of our species.

Regardless of all of the speculation haters have for her, she has NEVER been convicted of anything. Anyone who tries to say she should be in jail should also try to remember that she has been investigated for just about every speculation/accusation and no charges have stuck, because there is no evidence to support the claims.

However, I still do not trust anything the woman says. How many times has she changed her position, redacted statements, and claimed to have "mis-spoke" when asked about comments and/or decisions in regard to policy. She supported the institutional racism that sent a massive amount of black/african-american people to prison for unjust amounts of time because they are, "super predators".

In addition to this she has proven that she will tell the public anything to get their votes, and immediately after attend meetings with potential investors- the people she actually serves. Neither of these candidates are worth the time it will take to vote for them.

People try to say one is more qualified, or one is the lesser of two evils, but to me both are equally terrible, just in different ways. Both are simply trying to use government to further their own personal/familial growth, at the expense of tax payers, and anyone else who gets in their way.

My only hope is that this is the end of an era, and that these two representations of people we should all despise- liars and narcissists.